It’s still January. I dare you (and me) to set a few goals.
The good news is that writing down realistic goals related to things we really care about can help us move closer to our aspirations. Goals that are the outcome of thoughtful reflection regarding who I am, where I aim to go, and what I can let go of help me feel regrounded and refocused, especially at the beginning of a new year, week, or even beautiful new day.
The bad news is that failing to meet our goals stinks and can sour us on trying next time. Höpfner and Keith found that failing to meet difficult and specific goals can actually be damaging to our mood, self-esteem, and motivation for future challenges. I think this is why many people don’t even want to bother: the fear of goal failure is more compelling than the possible satisfaction of getting closer to where we want to go.
Moving towards aspired goals is central to the working definition of purpose in life that I’ve used in research: a set of life aims that motivates a person’s daily pursuits, decisions, and resource use, and provides a sense of directedness. Given that setting goals can help us and failing goals can harm us, what are we Purpose People to do?
I need the prioritizing and structure that having aims or goals provide, especially as I move deeper into my new lifestyle (aka retirement) that lacks the built-ins of my professional life. And so, this year, I’m using a purpose in life framework to organize some annual aims that create a road map towards what I most want for my life. My aims for 2025 represent a limited number of high priority intentions that align with my inner Compass, for which progress in the desired direction matters more than goal achievement. I spent a couple weeks jotting down ideas regarding aspirations for the year ahead; clumped the keepers into broader categories; and wrote them where I’d likely see them again. I also wrote down related “purpose choices” – small steps I can take in a day or a week that align with my aims. The result is like a TripTik or travel plan to my desired destination that I can always modify; it is definitely not a set of yardsticks to measure who I am, whether I’m “fixed,” my productivity, or worthiness.
What about you? If you know what living with purpose looks like for you, consider the direction you hope to go in your life and describe where you hope to be in various dimensions of the journey a year from now. If you don’t know what living with purpose looks like for you, I invite you to invest in figuring that out, keeping in mind that purpose is lived out in the attitudes we choose to embody, the experiences we savor, and what we do. Maybe that’s the aim for 2025 right there!
Onward!
Sources:
Höpfner J, Keith N (2021). Goal missed, self hit: Goal-setting, goal-failure, and their affective, motivational, and behavioral consequences. Frontiers in Psychology, 12, 704790. doi: 10.3389/fpsyg.2021.704790.
Find the abstract here: https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/34621213/
McKnight P E & Kashdan T B (2009). Purpose in life as a system that creates and sustains health and well-being: An integrative, testable theory. Review of General Psychology, 13(3), 242-251. https://doi.org/10.1037/a00171
Find the abstract here: https://journals.sagepub.com/doi/10.1037/a0017152